A Tranny Trouble
Everyday Living
A guy is hanging out in his favorite bar when he spots a
fabulous babe walking in on the arm of some ugly dude. He asks
the bartender about her and is surprised to discover that she’s
a prostitute. He watches her the rest of the night, amazed that
someone so attractive could be available to him. The next night
he goes back to the bar, and sure enough she shows up again,
only this time alone. The guy gets up his nerve and approaches
her.
„Is it true you’re a prostitute?“
„Why, sure, big boy. What can I do for you?“
„Well, I dunno. What do you charge?“
„I get $100 just for a hand job. We can negotiate from there…“
„$100!?! For a handjob? Are you nuts?“
„You see that Ferrari out there?“ The guy looks out the front
door, and sure enough there’s a shiny new Ferrari parked
outside. „I paid cash for that Ferrari with the money I made on
hand jobs. Trust me, it’s worth it.“
The guy mulls it over for a while, and decides what the hell. He
leaves with her, and gets the most unbelievable experience he’s
ever had. This hand job was better than any complete sexual
experience in his miserable life. The next night he’s back at
the bar, waiting eagerly for her to show up. When she does, he
immediately approaches her.
„Last night was incredible!“
„Of course it was. Just wait til you try one of my blow jobs…“
„How much is that?“
„$500“
„$500!?! C’mon, that’s ridiculous!“
„You see that apartment building across the street?“ The guy
looks out front at a 12 story apartment building. „I paid cash
for that building with the money I made on blow jobs. Trust me,
it’s worth it.“
Based on the night before, the guy decides to go for it. He
leaves with her, and once again is not disappointed. He nearly
faints - twice. The next night he can hardly contain himself
until she shows up.
„I’m hooked, you’re the best! Tell me, what’ll it cost me for
some pussy?“
She motions for him to follow her outside. She points down the
street, here between the buildings he can see Manhattan. „You
see that island?“
„Aw, c’mon! You can’t mean that!“
She nods her head.
„You bet. If I had a pussy, I’d own Manhattan!“
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Why did God give men penises?
So we’d have at least one way to shut a woman up.
What’s the difference between a paycheck and your dick?
You don’t have to beg a woman to blow your paycheck.
How is a woman like a laxative?
They both irritate the shit out of you.
What are the small bumps around a woman’s’ nipples for?
Its Braille for „suck here“.
Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
Did you hear about the guy who finally figured out women?
He died laughing before he could tell anybody.
What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a pitbull?
Lipstick.
Why do women have tits?
So men will talk to them.
What’s the difference between a woman and a coffin?
You come in one and go in the other.
Why do women close their eyes during sex?
They can’t stand seeing a man have a good time.
What’s six inches long and two inches wide and drives women wild?
Money.
Why did the army send so many women with PMS to the Persian Gulf?
They fought like animals and retained water for 4 days.
What’s the difference between your wife and your job?
After 5 years your job will still suck.
What’s the best thing about a blow job?
Ten minutes of silence.
Why are hurricanes normally named after women?
When they come they’re wild and wet, but when they go
they take your house and car with them.
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