Motivationsschreiben in Englisch - Masterstudium

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#1

Hallo Forum,

ich bewerbe mich für ein Master in Acounting und Controlling an einer Berliner Hochschule. Dazu muss ich ein Motivationsschreiben in Englisch verfassen.

Ich würde mich freuen, wenn ihr mal drüber lesen könntet und mir sagen würdet, ob es irgendwo Fehler (Kommas, Grammatik, Ausdruck) gibt. Vor allem aber KOMMAS!!

Vielen Dank schonmal im Voraus.

Hier mein „letter of motivation“

Dear Sir or Madam

I hereby apply for entrance to the Master’s Programme Accounting and Controlling at the Berlin School of Economics and Law for the autumm term 2013.
I studied Business Administration (B.A.) at the HTW-Berlin, University of Applied Sciences and completed my degree in april of 2013.

During my undergraduate studies I specialised in accounting, controlling and middle-sized entities. As I wanted to combine these different domains, my bachelor’s thesis had the title „IFRS als Alternative zur Rechnungslegung nach HGB für KMU“. In this work I analysed in how far the International Financial Ratings Standards are suitable for middle-seized entities in Germany. With regard to the special field of middle-seized entities and their specific problems, I did a comparative analysis of IFRS and HGB. As a result of this, I found out that the IFRS are not able to meet the accounting requirements of those specific type of companies.

As I completed a banking training in 2007, I decided to continue working in a bank parallel to my studies. So with the beginning of my studies in 2008 I started to work at XXX Bank AG in the loan department. Lateron I did a six month practical training period in the finance departement of the XXX Fluggesellschaft mbH. The fact that this company was considering to use IFRS for SMEs at this time, gave me the possibility to work on different interesting and demanding accounting projects.

During the last years I had the opportunity to gain practical experience in banking but also in accounting and controlling. In the long run I aspire to work in an executive position in the accounting department of an internationally active company. To meet the requirements of a leadership position and to be prepared for the demanding tasks, I want to enhance my knowledge in the field of accounting and controlling and also deepen my skills in managerial questions.

There are different reasons for choosing this specific Master’s programme at the Berlin School of Economics and Law. One reason is that there is excellent teaching staff like Dr. XXX. Another reason is the international orientation of this Master’s programme which helps to create networks and new relationships.

I am convinced that trough my academic knowledge, my practical experience, my high motivation and my strong interest for managerial questions, I am well suited as a candidate for the Master’s programme Accounting and Controlling.

I sincerely hope to be admitted to the Master’s programme to have the opportunity to further enhance my carreer.

Yours sincerely,

#2

*x* = corrected
Dear Sir or Madam

I hereby apply for entrance to the Master’s Programme Accounting and Controlling at the Berlin School of Economics and Law for the * Autumn* term 2013. 
I studied Business Administration (B.A.) at the HTW-Berlin, University of Applied Sciences and completed my degree in “April” 2013. 

During my undergraduate studies I specialised in accounting, controlling and middle-sized entities. As I wanted to combine these different domains, my bachelor’s thesis had the title „IFRS als Alternative zur Rechnungslegung nach HGB für KMU“. In this work I analysed how far the International Financial Ratings Standards are suitable for middle-* sized* entities in Germany. With regard to the special field of * middle-sized* entities and their specific problems, I * undertook* a comparative analysis of IFRS and HGB. As a result of this, I found out that the IFRS are not able to meet the accounting requirements of * these* specific type of companies. 

As I completed a banking training in 2007, I decided to continue working in a bank parallel to my studies. So with the beginning of my studies in 2008 I started to work at XXX Bank AG in the loan department. Lateron I * participated in * a six month practical training period in the finance department XXX Fluggesellschaft mbH`s finance *department*. The fact that this company was considering to use IFRS for SMEs at this time, gave me the possibility to work with different very interesting and * challenging* accounting projects. 

During the last years I had the opportunity to gain practical experience in banking but also in accounting and controlling. In the long run I aspire to work in an executive position in the accounting department of an internationally active company. To meet the requirements of a leadership position and to be prepared for the demanding tasks, I * would like to * to enhance my knowledge in the field of accounting and controlling and also * to * deepen my skills * concerning * managerial questions. 

There are *a variety of * reasons for choosing this specific Master’s programme at the Berlin School of Economics and Law. One reason is that there is excellent teaching staff like Dr. XXX. Another reason is the international orientation of this Master’s programme which helps to create networks and new relationships. 

I am convinced that *through* my academic knowledge, my practical experience, my high motivation and my strong interest for managerial questions, I am very well suited as a candidate for the Master’s programme Accounting and Controlling. 

I sincerely hope to be admitted to the Master’s programme to have the opportunity to further enhance my *career*. 

* I am looking forward to a favourable response*

Yours * faithfully*
xy

#3

… deshalb noch Ergänzungen
Dear Sir or Madam

I am applying to your Master’s Programme Accounting and Controlling
starting in autumn 2013. I studied Business Administration (B.A.) at the HTW/University of Applied Sciences Berlin and completed my degree in April 2013.

During my undergraduate studies I specialised in accounting,
controlling and middle-sized entities. As I wanted to combine
these different domains, I analysed in my bachelor’s thesis with the title „IFRS als Alternative zur Rechnungslegung nach HGB für KMU“ in how far the International Financial Ratings Standards are suitable for middle-seized entities in Germany. With regard to the special field of middle-seized entities and their specific problems, I did a comparative analysis of IFRS and HGB and found out that the IFRS are not able to meet the accounting requirements of this specific type of compan y.

As I completed a banking training in 2007, I decided to
continue working in a bank parallel to my studies. So with the
beginning of my studies in 2008 I started to work in the loan department of XXX Bank AG. Later on I * participated in * a six-
month practical training period in XXX Fluggesellschaft mbH`s finance *department*. The fact that this company was considering to use IFRS for SMEs at this time gave me the chance to work ON different very interesting and * challenging* accounting projects. 

During the last years I had the opportunity to gain practical
experience in banking but also in accounting and controlling.
In the long run I aspire to work in an executive position in
the accounting department of an internationally active
company. To meet the requirements of a leadership position and
to be prepared for the demanding tasks, I * would like to * to
enhance my knowledge in the field of accounting and
controlling and also to further improve my
managerial skills. 

There are *a variety of */there are various (zwei Gründe werden aber nur genannt) reasons for choosing this specific Master’s programme. One reason is the excellent teaching staff, for example Dr. XXX. Another reason is the international orientation of this Master’s programme, which helps to create networks and new relationships. 

I am convinced that my academic knowledge, my
practical experience, my high motivation and my strong
interest for managerial issues (?) make me very well-suited as a
candidate for the Master’s programme Accounting and
Controlling. 

I sincerely hope to be admitted to the Master’s programme to
have the opportunity to further enhance my *career*. 

I am looking forward to a favourable reply.

Yours * faithfully* (es sei denn, du richtest das Schreiben doch noch an eine bestimmte Person, was besser wäre. Dann sincerely)

@Lady Chanel: Ausdruck ist noch so naja (es lesen eh bloß Deutsche, oder?), aber das hängt auch mit dem Inhalt/der Art dich darzustellen zusammen. Du verwendest viel Passiv; es klingt sehr unpersönlich und mehr wie ein Bericht, was du bisher gemacht hast.
Grüße

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