- In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as:
a) lovemaking
b) screwing
c) the pigskin bus pulling into tuna town
- You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you’ve both shared:
a) your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship
b) your blood-test results
c) five tequila slammers
- You time your orgasm so that:
a) your partner climaxes first
b) you both climax simultaneously
c) you don’t miss SportsCenter
- Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:
a) healthy, creative love-play
b) not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend could ever agree to
c) not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend need ever find out about
- Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you’ve just had sex with is:
a) the best part of the experience
b) the second best part of the experience
c) $100 extra
- Your girlfriend says she’s gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is:
a) impossible - she looks too gorgeous!
b) not a problem, she can join your gym
c) a conservative estimate
- You think today’s sensitive, caring man is:
a) a myth
b) an oxymoron
c) a moron
- Foreplay is to sex as:
a) appetizer is to entree
b) primer is to paint
c) a line is to an amusement park ride
- Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship?
a) „I hope we can still be friends.“
b) „I’m not in right now, please leave a message at the beep.“
c) „Welcome to Dumpsville, population, YOU.“
- A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:
a) probably needs more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy
b) is uptight and a waste of time
c) shouldn’t have sat next to you on the bus in the first place
Score 1 point for every answer „a“
Score 2 points for every answer „b“
Score 3 points for every answer „c“
Your Score
10 points: You are a saint, a liar, or a eunuch.
11-20 points: You are an average joe. Good luck in the battle of the sexes.
21-30 points: You are a real man’s man. Your fear of intimacy with women and your love of men’s sports screams latent homosexuality. You need a nice she-male dominatrix to teach you respect.
31-40 You can’t add.
Ciao! Bjoern