There once was a young girl named Alice
who used dynamite as a phallus.
They found her vagina
in North Carolina
and her anus in Buckingham Palace.
„There was a young man called Kleene
Who invented a fucking machine
Concave or convex –
it fit either sex
and was exceedingly easy to clean“.
Limerick, wird John von Neumann zugeschrieben.
Nymphomaniacal Jill
Tried dynamite for a thrill.
They found her vagina
In North Carolina,
And bits of her tits in Brazil.
war zwar vor paar tagen mal hier, naja… aber passt doch grad so schön zu den anderen 
There was a young guy named Dave,
who kept a dead whore in a cave,
He said „I admit,
I’m a bit of a shit,
but think of the money I save!“
(Fand ich auf irgendeiner Toilette in den USA 1979)
Burkhard
Zwei Knaben gingen auf den Gletscher,
sie wurden Matsch und immer mätscher.
Da sprach der mätschere zum matschen:
komm, lass un wieder runter latschen
gruß
eX
There was an old man of Peru
Who dreamed he was eating his shoe.
He awoke in the night
in a terrible fright –
and found it was perfectly true.
Gruß
Bolo2L
There was an old man of Calcutta
Who spoke in a terrible stutter.
At breakfast he said:
"Give me b-b-b-bread
And b-b-b-b-b-b-butter
Gruß
Bolo2L
There once was a young man called Paul
who went on a fancy dress ball.
He thought he would risk it
and go as a biscuit,
but a dog ate him up in the hall.
There was a young lady from Trent
whose TV-antenna got bent
her neighbours went crazy
their screen all went hazy
instead of receiving she sent!
There was a young lady of Riga
Who smiled as she rode on a tiger
They returned from the ride
With the lady inside
And a smile on the face of the tiger
There once was a man named Kent
Whose dick was so long it was bent.
To stay out of trouble,
He stuck it in double
And instead of coming, he went!
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There was a librarian from Yale
Who’s dick was unusually pale,
When women first see it
They scream and then flee it,
So now he dates girls who read Braille.
[Braille = Blindenschrift]
***************************************
There was a young man from Divizes
Whose balls were of two different sizes.
One was so small,
It was no ball at all,
While the other had won several prizes!
***************************************
A young woman from North Carolina
Placed fiddle strings 'cross her vagina.
With the proper size cocks
What was sex became Bach’s
Toccata and fugue in D Minor.
***************************************
There once was a grandiose fart,
That got off to bellicose start,
'Twas disturbingly sweet
Among the elite,
And got bottled and labelled as Art.
***************************************
There was a young man from Tycoon,
Who took a lesbian up to his room,
They argued all night
As to who had the right,
To do what, with what, and to whom.
***************************************
There once was a man from Iran,
Who couldn’t get his lines to really properly scan,
his main problem is,
he drank pints of gin fizz,
and tried to make sure the last line lasted as long as it possibly can.
u.s.w. Im Netz gibt’s tausende davon.
Gruß
Heiliger Bimbam
There was a young lady of nime
she had three men on a time
asked: why the third?
she replied: one is absurd,
an bigamy, Sir, is a crime!
Eine Hausfrau in Claustal-Zellerfeld
jeden Tag in ihren Keller fällt.
Sie hält den Rekord
in diesem Sport
weil sie jeden Tag schneller fällt.
Eine ehrbare Lady in Plauen
beschloss, was Sittsames zu bauen.
Sie baute im Moos
zwei verschiedene Klos
für Spatzenmänner und -frauen.
Ein Bergsteiger vom Stamm der Papaya
wollt besteigen den Himalaya.
Doch als er in Lhasa
die Sache von nah sah,
da dachte er: Au weia!
Er war Kapitän auf dem Ganges,
ein Nautiker ersten Ranges.
Einst sah er ein Riff,
doch er fuhr mit dem Schiff
nicht dagegen, sondern entlang es. (nun ja…)
Es war eine Dame in Gladbeck,
der lief einmal ihr Neffe weg.
Sie lief hinterher,
denn sie liebte ihn sehr,
und außerdem trug er ihr Handgepäck.
There was a fellow named Hall
who fell in the spring in the fall.
It would have been a sad thing
if he died in the spring,
but he didn’t, he died in the fall.
zwei knaben saßen auf einer Bank
der eine roch, der andere stank.
Da sprach der Roch zum Stank:
Ich gehe auf ´ne andre Bank
Zwei Knaben machten sich den Jokus
und tranken Most im Keller.
Dann mussten beide auf den Lokus
jedoch der Most war schneller.
Beides Fredl Fesl aus seiner niederbayerischen Heimat Niederbayern